One of the most popular streamers on Twitch, Sykkuno‘s previous job was a software developer before he became a full-time streamer. Despite joining YouTube in 2011, his career took off due to the popularity of League of Legends.

Sykkuno has more than 3.7 million followers on Twitch and 2.64 million subscribers on YouTube and he regularly streams with his real-life friend Corpse Husband, as well as other well-known steamers like Valkyrae, LilyPichu, Ludwig, and Disguised Toast. However, success does not always imply a straightforward path. There have been many stumbling blocks along the way.

It’s easy to dismiss streamers as people who make a living by playing video games, but it’s important to remember that they’re also people. People who are frequently subjected to far more than their fair share of harassment from the community’s less supportive members. Sykkuno, unfortunately, is no exception. Here are a few of the more heartbreaking details about his path to Twitch streaming fame.

Viewers of Sykkuno’s Twitch streams may notice that when he laughs, he has an odd habit of covering his mouth. He’ll crack a joke or hear something amusing from one of his teammates, and then his hand will fly up to shield his mouth and nose. It’s so automatic that it’s clearly a reflex rather than something he chooses to do at this point. Many fans have wondered where this tick came from, but one Reddit user claims to know the answer.

Zimi1G started a Reddit thread in response to the streamer’s unusual behavior. Many people have expressed their thoughts, but user SuggestionAgreeable2 posted the alleged quote, “people [made] fun of me in the past so it just became a habit,” confirming many fans’ suspicions. This statement is said to have come from a now-deleted stream in which Sykkuno answered the question for some of his viewers.

People aren’t always aware of the impact their words have on the people around them. It’s important to remember the long-term effects of this type of teasing on a person’s self-esteem.

Toxic gamers are a major issue in the gaming industry. This has probably happened to everyone from esports pros to the average joe playing a casual game of “Fortite” on their phone. It’s also not just limited to video games. Inappropriate behavior in the gaming community also extends to tabletop RPGs. Many people believe it is preferable to simply ignore such behavior rather than feed it by drawing attention to the perpetrators. However, it’s sometimes easier said than done.

Sykkuno announced his decision not to play “Dungeons & Dragons” on Twitch in a livestream earlier this year. “D&D was by far the worst fan experience I’ve ever had,” he said. “Isn’t it true that I’m a subscriber to Lily’s channel? I was occasionally banning her long-time subs. I remember feeling bad because this guy had been subbed to Lily for nine months and I had banned him because he had threatened to kill me.”

Apart from the obvious reasons for this behavior, it’s also unfortunate that this toxicity is ruining “Dungeons & Dragons” for streamers who want to play it in a public setting. After all, when streamers decide to bring a game to the forefront, it gains a massive amount of popularity.

“If a girl said you were cute vs. a guy saying you were cute, which one would you feel more complimented by?” Disguised Toast asked Sykkuno during a “Minecraft” stream last year. “A guy,” Sykkuno replied, “because I feel like the girl is making fun of me.” Toast was taken aback by this unexpected response and asked Sykkuno to elaborate on his response, assuming that Sykkuno had encountered a girl who had said he was cute as part of a dare.

“It wasn’t a dare,” Sykkuno clarified. “She also demanded my phone number… Later, I discovered she had simply written my phone number in the bathroom to troll me, and for the next year, I received random calls… So now, when a girl calls me cute, I just think to myself, “hmm.” I assume she’s making fun of me again.”

Sykkuno’s account of the incident revealed that the deception had left an indelible impression on him, making it difficult for him to accept compliments at face value. Toast later referred to Sykkuno as a genius, and inquired if anyone had ever told him so. “Lily did say it once,” Sykkuno replied, “but I’m not sure if she was joking or not.”

Sykkuno may now have a large number of close friends (and millions of followers), but it wasn’t always like this. He didn’t have any friends not long ago, according to reports.

During a previous stream, Sykkuno said, “I didn’t have any friends or anyone with whom I could talk. I simply went to work, returned home, and went to sleep. So I’d turn on a lot of streams to give the impression that someone was trying to talk to me.” Loneliness is a problem that affects everyone at some point in their lives. It’s comforting to know that, despite the toxicity, Sykkuno found solace in the Twitch community when he was struggling.

After that, Sykkuno said, “Because of all the people who show up, I think I’m glad I started streaming. Hopefully, I’ll be able to cheer you up a little.” As heartbreaking as that is, it’s encouraging to see Sykkuno believe he has moved on from that dark period in his life. Sharing his story could be extremely beneficial to those who are going through a similar situation.